One week! It’s been exactly one week since I’ve been on any type of social media. I mean snooping around a little is one thing as well as re-sharing posts. But posting and writing from my thoughts is totally different.
Last Tuesday I had my normal outpatient chemotherapy. Wednesday I went with my sister to an event to celebrate the life of Billy Frank. That night ended up blending into Thursday and Friday with after chemo effects.
Fatigue. Nauseousness with every smell of seafood scented foods. Body pain and aching. Just plain chemo kicking cancer craziness!
Still a little weak but if you see me out and about I’ll still smile and give you a great big hug.
2 more cycles of 7 dosages of 5 types of chemo within a span of 10 days. Shots, medications while trying to remind my now chemo brain to drink more then the usual liquids as well as eating. (Which I haven’t been very good about doing)
Although I’ve not had a problem at all with eating pastries from a new bakery in Tacoma or even the Mac& Cheese from Panera’s I’m still pushing on and trying my best to remain in a state of aloha and mahalo. Sounds funny when I say it like that but it’s true.
To have an aloha spirit means to
“Akahai”, meaning kindness to be expressed with tenderness;
“Lōkahi”, meaning unity, to be expressed with harmony;
“ʻOluʻolu” meaning agreeable, to be expressed with pleasantness;
“Haʻahaʻa”, meaning humility, to be expressed with modesty;
“Ahonui”, meaning patience, to be expressed with perseverance.
(Google: The Law Of Aloha)
Now a mahalo spirit is just having a gratitude spirit. Being thankful.
So many questions keep floating thru my head. All of the “why’s”. While I’m trying to make sure my mind doesn’t live in my past has been a little hard. I loved the beauty of me. All I see now is tired eyes, chubby cheeks and a bald head.
And then, like a dotto, I had to be reminded. That I am needed. I am wanted. And I am most definitely loved! We all are. Although I was in a bit of a state, you, all of you, were in my thoughts and in my prayers. I couldn’t help but think about each and every one of you who have been helping me on this journey of mine. So to you, I send my Aloha.